Tuesday, October 23, 2012

My 6 year bid

When I tell people how I have 2 baby daddies I get the "Your a hoe" look of disgust. I am not a hoe but I was stupid. I love both of my children and may very much despise both of their fathers but that was my doing and if I didn't have 2 loser baby daddies I wouldn't have 2 beautiful children and not have met the true man of my dreams. As Fate would have it I had to go through some crap before finding him.
Fate is a funny thing to happen if you pay attention to it. When I first moved to CT I had a few friends which I lost after moving to CT 4 months later because of the break up with Lexi's dad. After this Fate tried it's hand it connecting us but it obviously wasn't the right time. See I was lost for a bit after Lexi's dad and I broke it off. I had no one and nowhere to go but I had 1 person who tried to get me out of my funk, she invited me to this club but we had to take a modified school bus to get to Stars. This is where Jeremiah and I were in the same place at the same time but didn't connect. A few months later after I picked myself up and was on my own with a 1 year old and I was determined to not go back home to NNY. My mother begged me to come home but I wouldn't give in. I got a 3rd shift job, found some "friends," and had had it together. I will admit it was difficult, have you ever tried working a 3rd shift job and trying to sleep after work with a toddler? Yea it wasn't easy but obviously I muddled through.  Then I meet Logan's dad, I was looking for companionship and he was looking for more, it ended after a month but didn't last. After 5 months I had a surprise starting to bake. I was angry, couldn't understand how that could happen, 1 time without protection no that wasn't the cause of this, no no no it was much more devious than that. Hold onto that it will be explained.
So fast forward through the toxic relationship of abuse, arrest, and just all around deceiving. After 4 years of that crap I had moved my mom to CT but like all things that didn't last long. The day before Thanksgiving 2006 I made my holiday trip back home with a trailer in tow with my mom's items. I return back to CT and the first day back I had to go to work and I am checking over the new schedule and as Fate would have it Jeremiah is back. I was so mean to him and there really is no justification for my actions. For a month I paid him no attention, but one night I needed help with a web design page and a co-worker was going to help me but he would be at Jeremiah's house hanging out. Well well well I needed help and needed to hangout with people because my personal life outside of work was stressful and figured no harm no foul. So I went hung out go my homework done and went home around 1 (yes I do remember it like it was yesterday) and no nothing happened between Jeremiah and I as he had a girlfriend and I had a baby daddy. Well after months of a deceitful relationship with baby daddy #2 things had taken a twist and it was falling apart very quickly, more and more lies being pilled on until I found out the truth and snapped, see baby daddy #2 and I had been sleeping in separate rooms for a few month by then. Well the relationship with Jeremiah and I was strictly platonic. He was there for me when the entire thing fell apart. I moved out with both of my kids and ended that relationship.
I couldn't believe it happened again! I honestly believed that I wasn't meant to be with anyone. How could I have prevented this from happening again? Well Fate's gears began a turning and showed me that what I was feeling wasn't true. Here come's my night and shinning armor to the rescue.
He had already broken up with his girlfriend before this went down. He stood by my side, was there for the midnight breakdown's, and was the shinning star at work. He made me feel good about myself, treated me with the up most respect, showed me things I never knew existed. Now fast forward 6 years to this very moment in time... we have been through some things and experienced amazing things. We have had our ups and downs just like the rest but it is how it ends that makes me realize that he is perfect. When it's good we're amazing but when it's bad it's really bad. However because of these experiences it has made us stronger than before and no matter what is going on we will Prevail.

Can't explain it until you experience it

party bus action
Blinging wedding
my family
true love at it's best


  1. I'm glad you found someone that treats you right and respects you! Took awhile but you're so much better off now.

  2. I have someone that is perfect. Just like you and your corky man lol.